Barack Obama's Encounters With Death

There are some things that I’m absolutely sure about—the Golden Rule, the need to battle cruelty in all its forms, the value of love and charity, humility and grace.

Those beliefs were driven home two years ago when I flew down to Birmingham, Alabama, to deliver a speech at the city’s Civil Rights Institute. The institute is right across the street from the Sixteenth Street Baptist Church, the site where, in 1963, four young children—Addie Mae Collins, Carole Robertson, Cynthia Wesley, and Denise McNair—lost their lives when a bomb planted by white supremacists exploded during Sunday school, and before my talk I took the opportunity to visit the church. The young pastor and several deacons greeted me at the door and showed me the still-visible scar along the wall where the bomb went off. I saw the clock at the back of the church, still frozen at 10:22 a.m. I studied the portraits of the four little girls.

After the tour, the pastor, deacons, and I held hands and said a prayer in the sanctuary. Then they left me to sit in one of the pews and gather my thoughts. What must it have been like for those parents forty years ago, I wondered, knowing that their precious daughters had been snatched away by violence at once so casual and so vicious? How could they endure the anguish unless they were certain that some purpose lay behind their children’s murders, that some meaning could be found in immeasurable loss? Those parents would have seen the mourners pour in from all across the nation, would have read the condolences from across the globe, would have watched as Lyndon Johnson announced on national television that the time had come to overcome, would have seen Congress finally pass the Civil Rights Act of 1964. Friends and strangers alike would have assured them that their daughters had not died in vain—that they had awakened the conscience of a nation and helped liberate a people; that the bomb had burst a dam to let justice roll down like water and righteousness like a mighty stream. And yet would even that knowledge be enough to console your grief, to keep you from madness and eternal rage—unless you also knew that your child had gone on to a better place?

My thoughts turned to my mother and her final days, after cancer had spread through her body and it was clear that there was no coming back. She had admitted to me during the course of her illness that she was not ready to die; the suddenness of it all had taken her by surprise, as if the physical world she loved so much had turned on her, betrayed her. And although she fought valiantly, endured the pain and chemotherapy with grace and good humor to the very end, more than once I saw fear flash across her eyes. More than fear of pain or fear of the unknown, it was the sheer loneliness of death that frightened her, I think—the notion that on this final journey, on this last adventure, she would have no one to fully share her experiences with, no one who could marvel with her at the body’s capacity to inflict pain on itself, or laugh at the stark absurdity of life once one’s hair starts falling out and one’s salivary glands shut down.

I carried such thoughts with me as I left the church and made my speech. Later that night, back home in Chicago, I sat at the dinner table, watching Malia and Sasha as they laughed and bickered and resisted their string beans before their mother chased them up the stairs and to their baths. Alone in the kitchen washing the dishes, I imagined my two girls growing up, and I felt the ache that every parent must feel at one time or another, that desire to snatch up each moment of your child’s presence and never let go—to preserve every gesture, to lock in for all eternity the sight of their curls or the feel of their fingers clasped around yours. I thought of Sasha asking me once what happened when we die—“I don’t want to die, Daddy,” she had added matter-of-factly—and I had hugged her and said, “You’ve got a long, long way before you have to worry about that,” which had seemed to satisfy her. I wondered whether I should have told her the truth, that I wasn’t sure what happens when we die, any more than I was sure of where the soul resides or what existed before the Big Bang. Walking up the stairs, though, I knew what I hoped for—that my mother was together in some way with those four little girls, capable in some fashion of embracing them, of finding joy in their spirits.

I know that tucking in my daughters that night, I grasped a little bit of heaven.

Excerpt from: Audacity of Hope
Book available here: Download Fiction Books (Nov 2018)

Ideas to live by (Carlos Slim Helu)

Carlos Slim Helu:
He is a Mexican business magnate, engineer, investor and philanthropist. From 2010 to 2013, Slim was ranked as the richest person in the world by the Forbes business magazine.

Advice from the business mogul:

1. Have a firm handshake.
2. Look people in the eye.
3. Sing in the shower.
4. Own a great stereo system. Music is life.

5. If in a fight, hit first and hit hard.

6. Don't expect life to be fair.

7. Never give up on anybody. Miracles happen everyday.

8. Always accept an outstretched hand.

9. Be brave. Even if you're not, pretend to be. No one can tell the difference.

10. Whistle.

11. Avoid sarcastic remarks.

12. Choose your life's mate carefully. From this one decision will come 90 per cent of all your happiness or misery ABSOLUTELY!.

13. Make it a habit to do nice things for people who will never find out.

14. Lend only those books you never care to see again.

15. Never deprive someone of hope; it might be all that he has.

16. When playing games with children, let them win.

17. Give people a second chance, but NOT a third.

18. Be romantic.

19. Become the most positive and enthusiastic person you know.

20. Loosen up. Relax. Except for rare life-and-death matters, nothing is as important as it first seems.

21. Don't allow the phone to interrupt important moments. It's there for our convenience, not the caller's.

22. Be a good loser.

23. Be a good winner.

24. Think twice before burdening a friend with a secret.

25. When someone hugs you, let him be the first to let go.

26. Be modest. A lot was accomplished before you were born.

27. Keep it simple at everytime.

28. Beware of the person who has nothing to lose.

29. Don't burn bridges. You'll be surprised how many times you have to cross the same river.

30. Live your life so that your epitaph could read, NO REGRETS. 

31. Be bold and courageous. When you look back on life, you'll regret the things you didn't do more than the ones you did.

32. Never waste an opportunity to tell people you love them.

33. Remember no one makes it alone. Have a grateful heart and be quick to acknowledge those who helped and loved you.

34. Take charge of your attitude. Don't let someone else choose it for you.

35. Visit friends and relatives when they are in hospital; you need only stay a few minutes.

36. Begin each day with some of your favourite prayer

37. Once in a while, take the scenic route.

38. Send a lot of greeting cards. Sign them, 'Someone who thinks you're terrific.'

39. Answer the phone with enthusiasm and energy in your voice.

40. Keep a note pad and pencil on your bed-side table. Million-dollar ideas sometimes strike at 3 a.m.

41. Show respect for everyone who works for a living, regardless of how trivial their job.

42. Send your loved ones flowers. Think of a reason later.

43. Make someone's day by paying the toll for the person in the car behind you.

44. Become someone's hero.

45. Marry only for love, it is key to your happiness if every other thing fails.

46. Count your blessings.

47. Compliment the meal when you're a guest in someone's home.

48. Wave at the children on a school bus/house/street/
49. Remember that 80 per cent of the success in any job is based on your ability to deal with PEOPLE. That is emotional intelligence.
50. Make sure someone says  THANK-YOU to you every day...
Good luck!

How meditation helps you become aware of not just yourself but of others as well!

Paradoxically, if we wish to become more aware of others and their concerns, there is perhaps no better work we can do than developing selfawareness. Consider the findings of a team of psychologists led by Professor David DeSteno, who recruited thirty-nine people from the Boston area for an unusual experiment. Twenty people were assigned to take a weekly meditation class for eight weeks and then to practice at home, while the remaining nineteen were informed that they were on a waiting list.

At the end of the eight-week period, the participants were invited, one by one, to come to the lab for an experiment. As each participant entered the waiting area, he or she found three chairs, two of them already occupied. As the participant took a seat and waited, a fourth person entered the room on crutches, wearing a boot for a broken foot, sighing audibly in pain as she leaned uncomfortably against the wall. Neither of the other two sitting people, who worked for the experimenters, gave up their seats. Researchers wanted to find out whether the participants in the experiment would give up their chair to the injured patient or not.

The results: 50 percent of those who had practiced meditation gave up their chair, compared to 16 percent of those who hadn’t meditated—a threefold difference! DeSteno explains this dramatic difference by pointing to the documented ability of meditation to enhance attention—our ability to see others—as well as to foster a view that all beings are connected. “The increased compassion of meditators, then, might stem directly from meditation’s ability to dissolve the artificial social distinctions—ethnicity, religion, ideology and the like—that divide us,” DeSteno writes. It all comes down then to elementary respect—the ability to see another human being.

Having given ourselves a “second look” through meditation, we are better able to give others a second look too.

The paradox reflected in this research is striking. By paying attention inside themselves through the practice of meditation, people were better able to pay attention outside themselves by showing kindness. The deeper we go inside ourselves, the farther we can go outside.

Source: Getting to Yes with Yourself (William Ury)

A Note on Differences Between A CEO and Any Other Employee (by Warren Buffett)

The performance of CEOs of investee companies, which we have observed at close range, contrasts vividly with that of many CEOs, which we have fortunately observed from a safe distance. Sometimes these CEOs clearly do not belong in their jobs; their positions, nevertheless, are usually secure. The supreme irony of business management in that it is far easier for an inadequate CEO to keep his job than it is for an inadequate subordinate.

If a secretary, say, is hired for a job that requires typing ability of at least 80 words a minute and turns out to be capable of only 50 words a minute, she will lose her job in no time. There is a logical standard for this job; performance is easily measured; and if you can't make the grade, you're out. Similarly, if new sales people fail to generate sufficient business quickly enough, they will be let go. Excuses will not be accepted as a substitute for orders.

However, a CEO who doesn't perform is frequently carried indefinitely. One reason is that performance standards for his job seldom exist. When they do, they are often fuzzy or they may be waived or explained away, even when the performance shortfalls are major and repeated. At too many companies, the boss shoots the arrow of managerial performance and then hastily paints the bullseye around the spot where it lands.

Another important, but seldom recognized, distinction between the boss and the foot soldier is that the CEO has no immediate superior whose performance is itself getting measured. The sales manager who retains a bunch of lemons in his sales force will soon be in hot water himself. It is in his immediate self-interest to promptly weed out his hiring mistakes. Otherwise, he himself may be weeded out. An office manager who has hired inept secretaries faces the same imperative.

But the CEO's boss is a Board of Directors that seldom measures itself and is infrequently held to account for substandard corporate performance. If the Board makes a mistake in hiring, and perpetuates that mistake, so what? Even if the company is taken over because of the mistake, the deal will probably bestow substantial benefits on the outgoing Board members. (The bigger they are, the softer they fall.)

Finally, relations between the Board and the CEO are expected to be congenial. At board meetings, criticism of the CEO's performance is often viewed as the social equivalent of belching. No such inhibitions restrain the office manager from critically evaluating the substandard typist.

These points should not be interpreted as a blanket condemnation of CEOs or Boards of Directors: Most are able and hardworking, and a number are truly outstanding. But the management failings that Charlie and I have seen make us thankful that we are linked with the managers of our three permanent holdings. They love their businesses, they think like owners, and they exude integrity and ability.

Source: Essays of Warren Buffett

9th Prediction -- The Next Step In Evolution

Ninth Insight was going to reveal where we humans were going with this evolution, where what we have achieved so far is going to lead, how will human society change?

The Ninth Insight explains how human culture will change in the next millennium as a result of conscious evolution. It describes a significantly different way of life. For instance, we humans will voluntarily decrease our population so that we all may live in the most powerful and beautiful places on the Earth. But remarkably, many more of these areas will exist in the future, because we will intentionally let the forests go uncut so that they can mature and build energy.

According to the Ninth Insight, by the middle of the next millennium, humans will typically live among five hundred year old trees and carefully tended gardens, yet within easy travel distance of an urban area of incredible technological wizardry. By then, the means of survival food stuffs and clothing and transportation-will all be totally automated and at everyone's disposal. Our needs will be completely met without the exchange of any currency, yet also without any overindulgence or laziness. Guided by their intuitions, everyone will know precisely what to do and when to do it, and this will fit harmoniously with the actions of others. No one will consume excessively because we will have let go of the need to possess and to control for security.

Our sense of purpose will be satisfied by the thrill of our own evolution-by the elation of receiving intuitions and then watching closely as our destinies unfold. The Ninth depicts a human world where everyone has slowed down and become more alert, ever vigilant for the next meaningful encounter that comes along. We will know that it could occur anywhere: on a path that winds through a forest, for instance, or on a bridge that traverses some canyon.

The Ninth Insight says that as the human race evolves spiritually, we will voluntarily decrease the population to a point sustainable by the Earth. We will be committed to living within the natural energy systems of the planet. Farming will be automated except for the plants one wants to energize personally and then consume. The trees necessary for construction will be grown in special, designated areas. This will free the remainder of the Earth's trees to grow and age and finally mature into powerful forests. Eventually, these forests will be the rule rather than the exception, and all human beings will live in close proximity to this kind of power. Think what an energy-filled world we will live in.

The important thing Ninth Insight tells right now is that we can now understand where we are going. We could not save the environment and democratize the planet and feed the poor before because for so long we could not release our fear of scarcity and our need to control, so that we could give to others. We couldn't release it because we had no view of life that served as an alternative.

We would need a cheap source of energy. Fusion, superconductivity, artificial intelligence, the technology to automate things. We're here on this planet not to build personal empires of control, but to evolve. Paying others for their insights will begin the transformation and then as more and more parts of the economy are automated, currency will disappear altogether. We won't need it. If we are correctly following OUT intuitive guidance then we will take only what we need. And we'll understand that the natural areas of the Earth have to be nurtured and protected for the sources of incredible power that they are.

The Ninth reveals our ultimate destiny. It reiterates that as humans, we are the culmination of the whole of evolution. It talks about matter beginning in a weak form and increasing in complexity, element by element, then species by species, always evolving into a higher state of vibration. When primitive humans came along, we continued this evolution unconsciously by conquering others and gaining energy and moving forward a little bit, and then being conquered ourselves by someone else and losing our energy. This physical conflict continued until we invented democracy, a system that didn't end the conflict but shifted it from a physical to a mental level. Now, we're bringing this whole process into consciousness. We can see that all of human history has prepared us to achieve conscious evolution. Now, we can increase our energy and experience the coincidences consciously. This carries evolution onward at a faster pace, lifting our vibrations even higher.

(Source: Celestine Prophecy by James Redfield)

Why forgive anyone?

An authentically empowered person is one who forgives. Forgiveness is not a moral issue. It is an energy dynamic. When most people forgive they do not want those that they forgave to forget that they forgave and forgot. This kind of forgiveness manipulates the person who is forgiven. It is not forgiveness. It is a means of acquiring external power over another.

Forgiveness means that you do not carry the baggage of an experience. When you choose not to forgive, the experience that you do not forgive sticks with you. When you choose not to forgive, it is like agreeing to wear dark, gruesome sunglasses that distort everything, and it is you who are forced every day to look at Life through those contaminated lenses because you have chosen to keep them. You wish everyone else to see the world that way because you wish to see the world that way, and it is indeed the world that you are looking at, but it is only you who sees it. You are looking through the lenses of your own contaminated love.

Forgiveness means that you do not hold others responsible for your experiences. If you do not hold yourself accountable for what you experience, you will hold someone else accountable, and if you are not satisfied with what you experience, you will seek to change it by manipulating that person. Complaining, for example, is exactly that dynamic of wanting someone to be responsible for what you experience, and to fix things for you.

Complaining is a form of manipulation, but you are free to move beyond that into the next step, which is perception and sharing without manipulation. What is at stake is not your sharing, but the intention behind it. When complaining is used instead of sharing, that is what becomes negative, but not the sharing. It is how you cast the sharing, or shape it, before-the intention with which you share. Before you share, ask yourself, "What is my intention in sharing this? Am I looking for a particular response?" Use this as a way of centering your attitude before committing energy to words. When you assume responsibility for what you experience and share what you experience in a spirit of companionship, that is the same as forgiveness.

When you hold someone responsible for what you experience, you lose power. You cannot know what another person will do. Therefore, when you depend upon another person for the experiences that you think are necessary to your well-being, you live continually in the fear that they will not deliver. The perception that someone else is responsible for what you experience underlies the idea that forgiveness is something that one person does for another. How can you forgive another person for the fact that you have chosen to step out of your power?

When you forgive you release critical judgment of yourself as well as of others. You lighten up. You do not cling to negative experiences that resulted from decisions that you made while you were learning. That is regret. Regret is the double negativity of clinging to negativity. You lose power when you regret. If one person grieves at his or her experiences while another is able to laugh, who is the lighter? Which is harmless? The heart that dances is the innocent heart. The one that cannot laugh is burdened. It is the dancing heart that is harmless.

This does not mean that you do not learn from what you have experienced, and apply that in each moment as you make your decisions. That is responsible choice. If you are doing all that you can to the fullest, of your ability as well as you can, there is nothing else that is asked of a soul.

(Source: Seat of the soul (by Gary Zukav))

A Spiritual Take on Addiction (Seat of the soul (Gary Zukav))

CHAPTER 10: ADDICTION

You cannot begin the work of releasing an addiction until you can acknowledge that you are addicted. Until you realize that you have an addiction, it is not possible to diminish its power. The personality rationalizes its addictions. It dresses them in attractive clothing. It presents them to itself and others as desirable or beneficial. A person who is addicted to alcohol, for example, will say to herself or himself, or to others, that drunkenness is a way of loosening up, of relaxing after a tense day, of having fun, and, therefore, it is constructive. A person who is addicted to sex will say to herself or himself, or to others, that random sexual encounters are expressions of closeness, or love, that they reflect an evolved and liberated perception, and, therefore, they are desirable.

Recognition of your own addictions requires inner work. It requires that you look clearly at the places where you lose power in your life, where you are controlled by external circumstances. It requires going through your defenses. Even when striving for clarity, or when outer circumstances-such as an injury caused by driving drunk, or a marriage wrecked by promiscuity-provide evidence of an addiction, the personality often clings to a perception of its addiction as a mere problem, initially, as a small problem, then as a bigger problem, and then as a significant problem. Why does the personality resist acknowledging its addictions? 

Acknowledging an addiction, accepting that you have an addiction, is acknowledgment that a part of you is out of control. The personality resists acknowledging its addictions because that forces it to choose to leave a part of itself out of control, or to do something about it. Once an addiction has been acknowledged, it cannot be ignored, and it cannot be released without changing your life, without changing your self-image, without changing your entire perceptual and conceptual framework. We do not want to do that because it is our nature to resist change. Therefore, we resist acknowledging our addictions. 

An addiction is not merely an attraction. It is natural for males and females to admireeach other, for example, and to feel a warmth and attraction toward each other. An addiction is more than that. An addiction is characterized by magnetism and fear. There is attraction plus fear, plus a jolt of energy that is out of proportion to the situation. Attractions are a pleasing part of life. They can be satisfied and left behind, but addictions cannot.

An addiction cannot be satiated. A sexual addiction, for example, cannot be satisfied by sex. This is the first clue that the dynamic that is involved in what appears to be a sexual addiction is not sexual, but that the experiences of addictive sexual attraction, or repulsion, serve a deeper dynamic.

An addiction can be anesthetized. A sexual addiction, for example, can be made dormant within a relationship by a fear of losing the security of the relationship, but it cannot be healed without a recognition that it is there, and an understanding of the dynamic that lies beneath it. Unless this takes place, it will break through the relationship, or the facade of monogamy, at those moments when the personality feels most insecure, or most threatened. At these times, the personality will feel a sexual attraction to others. 

Sexual addictions are the most universal within our species because the issues of power are tied so directly to the learning of sexuality within the human structure. Sexuality and issues of power were created within our species to complement each other. That is why each human being who is sexually out of control actually has issues of power in which he or she is out of control with his or her own power. At heart, they are identical. A person cannot be in his or her own power center and be sexually out of control or dominated by the sexual energy current. These cannot exist simultaneously. 

What is the dynamic behind sexual addiction?

The experience of addictive sexual attraction is a signal to the experiencer that in that moment he or she is experiencing powerlessness, and is desiring to feed upon a weaker soul. This is the dynamic beneath all addictions: the desire to prey upon a soul that is more shattered than oneself. This is as ugly to look at as it is to experience, but it is the central core of negativity within our species. Sex without reverence, like business without reverence, and politics without reverence, and any activity that is done without reverence, reflects the same thing: one soul preying upon another weaker soul. The way out of a sexual addiction, therefore, is to remind yourself when you feel that attraction, that you are, in that moment, powerless, and desiring to prey upon a soul that is weaker than yourself. In other words, when you are feeling the draw of a sexual addiction, consider simultaneously that you are in a mode of powerlessness that causes a desire to use others to surface within you. That desire feels like a sexual attraction. Remind yourself clearly of what it is that is being ignited in you. That does not mean that you do not physically feel a connection or an attraction, but, underneath it, what causes you to want to act is a different dynamic, one of powerlessness.

Allow this consciousness to penetrate deeply within you so that, at that point, if youwant to act on your addiction, you need to walk through your own reality.

If you are married, or in a monogamous relationship, remind yourself that acting upon your impulse may, or will, cost you your marriage, or your relationship. Ask yourself if what you want to do is worth that. If you are healthy, remind yourself that acting upon your impulse may cost you your health, because you do not know whether or not the partner that you have chosen carries a disease, such as AIDS. Ask yourself if what you want to do is worth that risk. 

Remind yourself that the partner to whom you are most likely drawn is drawn equally to others, as are you, that he or she has no more feeling for you than you have for him or her. You can be assured that this is the case because the sexual attraction that you have felt for this person is a response in you of a weakness detection system, so to speak, that you have used to scan those around you. When it locates a person who is weak enough to be susceptible to you, to be seduced by you, it triggers within you the experience of sexual attraction. Will you advance your masculinity, or your femininity, by exploiting the weakness of this person? Will that gain you what you want to gain? 

Remind yourself that you both have chosen to interact sexually in ways that do not ignite your feelings because, if your feelings were awakened, they would only let you know that the person you are drawn to is no more emotionally involved with you than you are with him or her. It is one thing to think that you are sexually involved with someone and not feeling anything. It is another to face that neither is your partner feeling anything for you.

Look closely at the dynamic in which you are involved, and you will see that when one soul seeks to prey upon a weaker soul, and a weaker soul responds, both souls are the weaker soul. Who preys upon whom? The logic of the five-sensory personality cannot grasp this, but the higher order logic of the heart sees it clearly. Is there truly a difference when two consciousnesses are trying to link into a dynamic that ultimately will lead to balance when both have identical missing pieces? What causes the need to dominate, for example, is the same that causes the need to be submissive. It is merely the choice of which role the soul wishes to play in working out the identical struggle.

Enter into your own fear, into your own sense of wanting a drink, or sex with a different partner. Ask yourself to seriously review all of the times in your life that you thought you would gain so much from that, and face what you gained. Hold onto the thought that you create your experiences. Your fear comes from the realization that a part of you is creating a reality that it wants, whether you want it or not, and the feeling that you are powerless to prevent it, but that is not so. This is critical to understand: your addiction is not stronger than you. It is not stronger than who you want to be. Though it may feel that way, it can only win if you let it. Like any weakness, it is not stronger than the soul or the force of will. Its strength only indicates the amount of effort that needs to be applied toward the transition, toward making yourself whole in that area of your life.

Recognize that what you are doing when you fear that you will be tempted, and that you will not be able to resist the temptation, is creating a situation that will give you permission to act irresponsibly. Is it possible to create a test that you cannot pass? Yes. The experience of wanting to be tempted in order to test yourself is the act of creating an opportunity to act irresponsibly, to say to yourself, "I knew I couldn't do it, anyway," and give in to your addiction. The heart of making a temptation that is greater than you can resist is that you do not wish to be held responsible for your choice.

The greater the desire of your soul to heal your addiction, the greater will be the cost of keeping it. If you-if your soul-have chosen to heal an addiction now, you will find that the decision to maintain your addiction will cost you the things that you hold most dear. If that is your wife or your husband, your marriage will be placed in the balance against your addiction. If that is your career, your career will be placed in the balance. 

This is not the doing of a cruel Universe or a malicious God. It is a compassionate response to your desire to heal, to become whole. It is the compassionate Universe saying to you that your inadequacies are so deep that the only thing that will stop you will be something of equal or greater value in opposition to your inadequacies. This is the same dynamic that is expressed in terms of space and time and matter by the second law of motion: "A change in the momentum (mass, direction of movement, and speed) of a body in motion is directly proportional to the force affecting the body in motion, and takes place in the direction that the force is acting." By the magnitude of the costs of your addiction you can measure the importance of healing it to your soul, and the strength of your own inner intention to do that. 

Try to realize, and truly realize, that what stands between you and a different life are matters of responsible choice. In your moments of fear, what you are obscure about in your thinking is the power and magnitude of your own choice. Recognize what your own power of choice is. You are not at the mercy of your inadequacy. The intention that will empower you must come from a place within you that suggests that you are indeed able to make responsible choices and draw the power from them, that you can make choices that empower you and not disempower you, that you are capable of acts of wholeness. Test your power of choice because each time you choose otherwise you disengage the power of your addiction more and more and increase your personal power more and more. 

As you work through your weaknesses, and you feel levels of addictive attraction,ask yourself the critical questions of the spirit: If, by following those impulses, do
you increase your level of enlightenment? Does it bring you power of the genuine
sort? Will it make you more loving? Will it make you more whole? Ask yourself
these questions.

This is the way out of an addiction: Walk yourself through your reality step by step. Make yourself aware of the consequences of your decisions, and choose accordingly. When you feel in yourself the addictive attraction of sex, or alcohol, or drugs, or anything else, remember these words: You stand between the two worlds of your lesser self and you're full self. Your lesser self is tempting and powerful because it is not as responsible and not as loving and not as disciplined, so it calls you. This other part of you is whole and more responsible and more caring and more empowered, but it demands of you the way of the enlightened spirit: conscious life. Conscious life. The other choice is unconscious permission to act without consciousness. It is tempting.

What choose you?
If your decision is to become whole, hold that decision. You will not be as tempted
or as frightened as you think. Hold it and remind yourself again and again: You stand
between your lesser self and your whole self. Choose with wisdom because the
power is now fully in your hands. Do not underestimate the power of consciousness.
As you live and make conscious choices each moment and each day you fill with
strength and your lesser self disintegrates.
As you choose to empower yourself, the part of you that you challenge, the
temptation that you challenge, will surface again and again. Each time that you
challenge it, you gain power and it loses power. If you challenge an addiction to
alcohol, for example, and you are drawn twelve times that very day to have a drink,
challenge that energy each time. If you look upon each recurrence of attraction as a
setback, or as an indication that your intention is not working, you choose the path of
learning through fear and doubt. If you look upon each recurrence as an opportunity
that is offered to you, in response to your intention, to release your inadequacy and to
acquire power over it, you choose the path of learning through wisdom, for that is
what it is.
The first time that you challenge your addiction, and the second, and the third, you
may not feel that anything has been accomplished. Do you think that authentic power
can be had so easily? As you hold to your intention, and as you choose again and
again and again to become whole, you accumulate power, and the addiction that you
thought could not be challenged will lose its power over you.
When you challenge an addiction, and choose to become whole, you align yourself
with your nonphysical help. The work to be done is yours, but assistance is always
there for you. The nonphysical world, the actions of your guides and Teachers,
touches yours in many ways-the thought that brings power, the memory that reminds,
the surprise occurrence that reinforces. There is much joy in the nonphysical world
when a soul releases major negativity and the quality of its consciousness shifts
upward into higher frequencies of Light. Therefore, do not suffer in aloneness. There
is no such thing.
Look at yourself as someone who is reaching for healing, and at the complexity of
what needs to be healed. Do not think that you exist alone without other human
beings of equal complexity. All that the human experience is about is the journey
toward wholeness. Therefore, you can look at each individual and rest assured that
they are not whole. They are in process. Were they whole, they would not be
physical upon our plane. In other words, you have the company of billions of souls.
When you have worked hard, take the time to appreciate what you have done. Do not
always look at the distance that you have yet to travel. Join your nonphysical
Teachers and guides in applauding what you have accomplished. This does not mean
to relapse into your addiction. It means allowing yourself to rest when you need it, to
recognize when you become exhausted, and to give yourself the grace of knowing
that even the best of us get tired.
Understanding the dynamics behind your addiction is one thing. Actually making the
emotional connection to discharge the need for it is another story. Your addiction is
not insurmountable. It is not overwhelming. If it continues to appear that way to you,
it is because deep in your heart you do not see yourself as able to release the
addiction, even if you understand why you are drawn to it. If your addiction lingers,
ask yourself if you really want to release it, because in your heart you do not.
Until you fill in the inadequacies within you, you will always have your addiction. In
order to release your addiction, it is necessary to enter your inadequacies, to
recognize that they are real, and to bring them into the light of consciousness to heal.
It is necessary to look deeply into the parts of yourself that have such power to you,
to look clearly at how deep they are within you, and to see them as honestly as you
can. It may be that your addiction has provided you one of the few genuine pleasures
of your life. What is more important to you, your wholeness, and your freedom, or
the pleasures that you get from satisfying your addiction?
When you understand that your addiction results from an inadequacy, the question
becomes how you will respond to your inadequacy-by reaching for another drink, or
another sexual encounter, or by reaching inward for those things that fill the whole?
Move into how strong the power of your addiction is, into how deeply you feel its
attraction, and ask yourself if the time is really right for you to release this form of
learning. That is for you to ask and answer. You may hear the guidance of your
nonphysical Teachers, and feel that it offers you a path of higher wisdom, but at the
same moment realize that you are not ready to take that path. You might decide that
this is not the right time, that you are not yet strong enough to live a certain way. You
might indeed have to face that.
Ultimately, you will take the higher path, but if you wish to put the journey off for a
day or a week or seven lifetimes, that is sufficient. Your Teachers see from a
perspective that does not include time. It is the depth of wisdom for you to know that
you will eventually take the path of consciousness. If that is the path that you will
eventually take, why wait? Yet, there are times when there is wisdom in waiting as
the rest of you prepares for the journey. There is no shame in this decision.
The Universe does not judge. Eventually, you will come to authentic empowerment.
You will know the power of forgiveness, humbleness, clarity and love. You will
evolve beyond the human experience, beyond the Earth school, beyond the learning
environment of space and time and matter. You cannot not evolve. Everything in the
Universe evolves. It is only a question of which way you will choose to learn as you
evolve. This is always your choice, and there is always wisdom in each choice.
When you return home, when you leave your personality and body behind, you will
leave behind your inadequacies, your fears and angers and jealousies. They do not,
and cannot, exist within the realm of spirit. They are the experiences of the
personality, of time and matter. You will once again enter the fullness of who you
are. You will perceive with loving eyes and compassionate understanding the
experiences of your life, including those that seemed so much to control you. You
will see what purposes they served. You will survey what has been learned, and you
will bring these things into your next incarnation.
If you choose to continue with your addiction, you choose to experience negative
karma. You choose to create without compassion. You choose to be unconscious.
You choose to learn through the experiences that your unconscious intentions create.
You choose to learn through fear and doubt, because you fear your addiction and you
doubt your power to challenge it successfully.
If you choose to challenge your addiction, to move consciously toward wholeness,
you choose to learn through wisdom. You choose to create your experiences
consciously, to align the perceptions and the energy of your personality with your
soul. You choose to create within physical reality the reality that your soul wishes to
create. You choose to allow your soul to move through you. You choose to allow
Divinity to shape your world.
When you struggle with an addiction, you deal directly with the healing of your soul.
You deal directly with the matter of your life. This is the work that is required to be
done. As you face your deepest struggles, you reach for your highest goal. As you
bring to light, heal, and release the deepest currents of negativity within you, you
allow the energy of your soul to move directly into, and to shape, the experiences and
events of physical reality, and thereby to accomplish unimpeded its tasks upon the
Earth.
This is the work of evolution. It is the work that you were born to do.

Source: Seat of the soul (Gary Zukav) Tags: Behavioral Science,Book Summary,Emotional Intelligence,Psychology,

The Path To Growth (by Gary Zukav)

 This article draws your attention to the vertical path, the path to growth, and to the difference between the vertical path and the horizontal path.

The vertical path is the path of awareness. It is the path of consciousness and conscious choice. The person who chooses to advance his or her spiritual growth, to cultivate awareness of his or her higher self, is on a vertical path. The vertical path is the path of clarity. The potential for the creation of clarity and the experience of interacting with your nonphysical Teacher are one and the same.

The horizontal path is the path that satisfies your personality. A businessman or a businesswoman, for example, who devotes his or her life to the accumulation of money is on a horizontal path. No matter how diverse his or her ventures may become, they are essentially identical. If they make money, they please the personality, and if they lose money, they distress the personality, but they do not serve the higher self. They do not serve his or her spiritual growth.

A person that seeks relationships only to gratify his or her own needs, such as his or her own emotional or sexual needs, will find that each relationship is essentially identical, that the people in his or her life are replaceable, that experiences with the first and experiences with the second are essentially the same. This is the horizontal path. Each new experience is not really new. It is more of the same thing. To experience relationships of substance and depth requires approaching and entering into relationships with consciousness and concern for the other. That is the vertical path.

This does not mean that learning does not occur in all situations, and that when a horizontal path is no longer appropriate to a soul's learning, that soul will not leave it behind. Sooner or later, each soul will turn toward authentic power. Every situation serves this goal, and every soul will reach it. The vertical path begins with the decision to do that consciously.

Source: Seat of the Soul (Gary Zukav)

The Brave Never Die

The wreck of the Birkenhead off the coast of Africa on the 27th of February, 1852, affords another memorable illustration of the chivalrous spirit of common men acting in this nineteenth century, of which any age might be proud. The vessel was steaming along the African coast with 472 men and 166 women and children on board. The men belonged to several regiments then serving at the Cape, and consisted principally of recruits who had been only a short time in the service. At two o’clock in the morning, while all were asleep below, the ship struck with violence upon a hidden rock which penetrated her bottom; and it was at once felt that she must go down. The roll of the drums called the soldiers to arms on the upper deck, and the men mustered as if on parade. The word was passed to save the women and children; and the helpless creatures were brought from below, mostly undressed, and handed silently into the boats. When they had all left the ship’s side, the commander of the vessel thoughtlessly called out, “All those that can swim, jump overboard and make for the boats.” But Captain Wright, of the 91st Highlanders, said, “No! if you do that, the boats with the women must be swamped;” and the brave men stood motionless. There was no boat remaining, and no hope of safety; but not a heart quailed; no one flinched from his duty in that trying moment. “There was not a murmur nor a cry amongst them,” said Captain Wright, a survivor, “until the vessel made her final plunge.” Down went the ship, and down went the heroic band, firing a feu de joie as they sank beneath the waves. Glory and honour to the gentle and the brave! The examples of such men never die, but, like their memories, are immortal.

Source: Self help (Samuel Smiles)

References: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/HMS_Birkenhead_(1845)

Why Socialism Won't Work

An economics professor at a local college made a statement that he had never failed a single student before, but had recently failed an entire class.

That class had insisted that socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich, a great equalizer.

The professor then said, "OK, we will have an experiment in this class on this plan : All grades will be averaged and everyone will receive the same grade!

After the first test, the grades were averaged and everyone got a B.

The students who studied hard were upset and the students who studied little were happy.

As the second test rolled around, the students who studied little had studied even less and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a free ride too so they studied little.

The second test average was a D!

No one was happy.

When the 3rd test rolled around, the average was an F!

As the tests proceeded, the scores never increased as bickering, blame and name-calling all resulted in hard feelings and no one would study for the benefit of anyone else.

To their great surprise, ALL FAILED and the professor told them that communism would also ultimately fail because when the reward is great, the effort to succeed is great, but when government takes all the reward away, no one will try or want to succeed.

These are possibly the 5 best sentences you'll ever read and all applicable to this experiment :

1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity.

2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.

3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.

4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it.

5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that is the beginning of the end of any nation.

When Letting Go Is The Better Choice

The manner in which many allow themselves to be sacrificed to their love of wealth reminds one of the cupidity of the monkey—that caricature of our species.

In Algiers, the Kabyle peasant attaches a gourd, well fixed, to a tree, and places within it some rice. The gourd has an opening merely sufficient to admit the monkey’s paw. The creature comes to the tree by night, inserts his paw, and grasps his booty. He tries to draw it back, but it is clenched, and he has not the wisdom to unclench it. So there he stands till morning, when he is caught, looking as foolish as may be, though with the prize in his grasp.

The moral of this little story is capable of a very extensive application in life.

Source: Self-Help by Samuel Smiles

Height of Managerial Expectations

One night, just before the shopkeeper was about to close the shop, a dog came into the shop.

There was a bag in its mouth. The bag had a list of items to be bought and money. The shopkeeper took the money and kept the items in the bag.

Immediately, The dog picked up the bag of items and left. The shopkeeper was surprised and went behind the dog to see who the owner was.

The dog waited at the bus stop. After sometime, a bus came and the dog got into the bus. As soon as the conductor came, it moved forward to show his neck belt which had money and the address as well. The conductor took the money and put the ticket in his neck belt again.

When it reached the destination, the dog went to the front and wagged his tail indicating that he wanted to get down. The moment the bus stopped, it got down. The shopkeeper was still following it.

The dog knocked on the door of a house with its legs. Its owner came from inside and beat it with a stick.

The shocked shopkeeper asked him "why are you beating the dog?", to which the owner replied, "he disturbed my sleep. It could have taken the keys with it."

This is the truth of life. There is no end to the expectations people have from you. The moment you go wrong, they start pointing at our mistakes. All the good done in the past is forgotten. Any small mistake committed then gets magnified. This is the nature of this material world!

No charge for love!

 
A farmer had some puppies he needed to sell. He painted a sign advertising the 4 pups, and set about nailing it to a post on the edge of his yard.

As he was driving the last nail into the post, he felt tug on his overalls.

He looked down into the eyes of a little boy.

"Mister," he said, "I want to buy one of your puppies."

"Well," said the farmer, as he rubbed the sweat of the back of his neck, "these puppies come from fine parents and cost a good deal of money."

The boy dropped his head for a moment. Then reaching deep into his pocket, he pulled out a handful of change and held it up to the farmer. "I've got thirty-nine cents. Is that enough to take a look?"

"Sure," said the farmer. And with that he let out a whistle. "Here Dolly!" he called.

Out from the doghouse and down ramp ran Dolly followed by four little balls of fur.

The little boy pressed his face against the chain link fence. His eyes danced with delight.

As the dogs made their way to the fence, the little boy noticed something else stirring inside the doghouse.

Slowly another little ball appeared, this one noticeably smaller.

Down the ramp it slid. Then in a awkward manner, the little pup began hobbling toward the others, doing its best to catch up....

"I want that one," the little boy said, pointing to the runt.

The farmer knelt down at the boy's side and said, "Son, you don't want that puppy. He will never be able to run and play with you like these other dogs would."

With that the little boy stepped back from the fence, reached down, and began rolling up one leg of his trousers. In doing so he revealed a steel brace running down both sides of his leg attaching itself to a specially made shoe.

Looking back up at the farmer, he said, "You see sir, I don't run too well myself, and he will need someone who understands."

With tears in his eyes, the farmer reached down and picked up the little pup. Holding it carefully he handed it to the little boy.

"How much?" asked the little boy.

"No charge," answered the farmer, "There's no charge for love."

Catch positivity with this 'Gloom Chaser'

Worry, and envy, and jealousy, and hatred, and doubt, and fear are all states of mind which are fatal to action. Any of these states of mind will interfere with, and in some instances destroy altogether, the digestive process through which the food is assimilated and prepared for distribution through the body. This interference is purely physical, but the damage does not stop here, because these negative states of mind destroy the most essential factor in the achievement of success; namely, desire to achieve. In the second lesson of this course you learned that your definite chief aim in life should be supported by a burning desire for its realization. You can have no burning desire for achievement when you are in a negative state of mind, no matter what the cause of that state of mind may be. To keep myself in a positive frame of mind I have discovered a very effective “gloom-chaser.” That may not be a very dignified way of expressing my meaning, but since the subject of this lesson is action and not dignity I will make it serve. The “gloom-chaser” to which I refer is a hearty laugh. When I feel “out of sorts” or inclined to argue with somebody over something that is not worthy of discussion, I know that I need my “gloom-chaser,” and I proceed to get away where I will disturb no one and have a good hearty laugh. If I can find nothing really funny about which to laugh I simply have a forced laugh. The effect is the same in both cases. Five minutes of this sort of mental and physical exercise - for it is both - will stimulate action that is free from negative tendencies.

(Book: Law of success (Napoleon Hill))

How Charles Dicken's 'A Christmas Carol' came into being - A note on 'contribution to society'

Recently, the Covey Leadership Center participated with the local PBS station in making available to the Public Broadcasting System a video dramatization we developed and filmed in England. The central figure in this remarkable story is an Englishman who transcended a childhood spent as a street urchin to become a reasonably successful writer with a nice home and a loving family. At the time of the story, however , he had reached a point where he was experiencing “writer’s block.” For some time, he had been unable to feel inspired in his writing. It seemed his creativity had turned off. His debts were mounting. He was under tremendous pressure from the publisher. He was becoming more and more depressed with a growing fear that his own children would end up on the streets like so many he saw around . . . like he, himself, had as a youth. He was discouraged. He couldn’t sleep. He began to spend his nights walking the streets of London. He saw the poverty, the inhumane conditions of children working nights in the factories, the terrible struggle of parents trying to eke out a living for their families. Gradually , the full reality of what he was seeing began to hit him—the impact of selfishness and greed and those who would take advantage of others. An idea touched his heart and began to grow in his mind. There was something he could do that would make a difference! He returned to his writing with an energy and enthusiasm he had never known. The vision of contribution impassioned him, consumed him. He no longer felt doubt or discouragement. He didn’t worry about his own financial concerns. He wanted to get this story out, to make it as inexpensive as possible, to make it available to as many people as possible. His whole life had changed. As a result, the world was changed. Charles Dickens’s masterpiece “A  Christmas Carol” has brightened the lives of millions of people around the world. For one hundred and fifty years his vision has left a wonderful legacy of hope, warmth, and caring.

(First things first, Stephen R Covey)

Where to invest your time - Learn from the Chinese bamboo tree

The Chinese bamboo tree is planted after the earth is prepared, and for the first four years, all of the growth is underground. The only thing visible above the ground is a little bulb and a small shoot coming out of it. Then, in the fifth year, the bamboo tree grows up to eighty feet. Principle-centered leaders understand the metaphor of the bamboo tree. They understand the value of working in Quadrant II (i.e., putting 'important but not urgent' tasks on priority) [1]. They know what it means to pay the price to prepare the ground, to plant the seed, and to fertilize and cultivate and water and weed, even when they can’t see immediate results, because they have faith that ultimately they will reap the fruits in the harvest. And what wonderful fruits they are!
Your organization’s culture is the one competitive advantage that cannot be duplicated. Technology can be copied. Information can be acquired. Capital can be bought. But the ability of your organization to collaborate effectively, to work in Quadrant II, to put first things first, cannot be bought, transferred, or installed. A high-trust, empowered culture is always home-grown. The same is true for a family, or any other group of people. A quality culture must be nourished over time. Only by acting in harmony with correct principles, exercising patience, humility, and courage, and working within your Circle of Influence can you transform yourself and positively influence your organization. You can only create empowerment from the inside out.

[1]: The idea of quadrants is to divide yous activities into four quadrants as follows:
Quadrant I is for 'important and urgent' tasks
Quadrant II is for 'important but not urgent' tasks
Quadrant III is for 'urgent but not important' tasks
Quadrant IV is for 'neither important nor urgent' tasks

12 Types Of Pain That Are Directly Linked To Emotional States

According to Dr. Susan Babel, a psychologist, emotions do affect chronic pain.
She says that chronic pain, beside physical injury, may be caused by stress and emotional issues.

Let’s take a look at what pain in a particular area of your body indicates:

Head
Headaches can be caused by stress life. If someone has chronic headaches she/he needs to grab some time for themselves on daily basis. Relaxing may help you to relieve your body from the head pain.

Neck
Neck pain implies the need to forgive. It may be to forgive yourself or to forgive some other person. It is very important to focus on things that you love about yourself or what others love in you.

Shoulders
Pain in the shoulders is sign that person carries a heavy emotional burden. Shoulders carry everything. To solve this problem share the load with friends or family.

Upper Back
Upper back pain manifests lack of emotional support. Probably the person is holding back feelings or doesn’t feel appreciated. Just talk about your feelings with your partner or close friend.

Lower Back
Pain in the lower back shows that person has financial worries. Sit down and focus on managing money.

Elbows
Elbow and arm pain signifies a lack of flexibility. Try not to resist the natural changes in your life.

Hands
Pain in the hands may be caused by a lack of friends. Try to meet new people.

Hips
Fear of change, moving or waiting on a big decision can cause the hip pain. Make the changes step by step.

Knees
Pain in the knee is a sign of high self-esteem. Maybe you should try to do some volunteering work and remember no one is perfect.

Calves
Calf pain is caused by stress, emotional tension or jealousy. Maybe it is time to let go the jealousy or any big stressor in your life.

Ankles
Pain in the ankle means that you need more pleasure in your life. Try to enjoy the little things and every moment in your life.

Feet
Foot pain occurs if you fight with depression. Depression is a specific disease, but for a start try to find a new hobby or just adopt a pet.

Friends this concept is scientifically proven so before adopting medicine or concern for the doctor, give some time and observe your thought... it starts healing you automatically.

Excerpt taken from book: 'You can heal your life'
You Can Heal Your Life is a 1984 self-help and new thought book by Louise L. Hay.

The Jar of Life - Time management basics

I attended a seminar once where the instructor was lecturing on time. At one point, he said, “Okay, it’s time for a quiz.” He reached under the table and pulled out a wide-mouth gallon jar. He set it on the table next to a platter with some fist-sized rocks on it. “How many of these rocks do you think we can get in the jar?” he asked.
After we made our guess, he said, “Okay. Let’s find out.” He set one rock in the jar . . . then another . . . then another. I don’t remember how many he got in, but he got the jar full. Then he asked, “Is that jar full?”
Everybody looked at the rocks and said, “Yes.”
Then he said, “Ahhh.” He reached under the table and pulled out a bucket of gravel. Then he dumped some gravel in and shook the jar and
the gravel went in all the little spaces left by the big rocks. Then he grinned and said once more, “Is the jar full?”
By this time we were on to him. “Probably not,” we said.
“Good!” he replied. And he reached under the table and brought out a bucket of sand. He started dumping the sand in and it went in all the little spaces left by the rocks and the gravel. Once more he looked at us and said, “Is the jar full?”
“No!” we all roared.
He said, “Good!” and he grabbed a pitcher of water and began to pour it in. He got something like a quart of water in that jar. Then he said, “Well, what’s the point?”
Somebody said, “Well, there are gaps, and if you really work at it, you can always fit more into your life.”
“No,” he said, “that’s not the point. The point is this: if you hadn’t put these big rocks in first, would you ever have gotten any of them in?”

Same principle is applicable to the way we manage our priorities and time. With the “more is better” paradigm, we’re always trying to fit more activities into the time we have. But what does it matter how much we do if what we’re doing isn’t what matters most?

Excerpt from: First things first (Stephen R Covey)